ALERT: The Army is Amassing!

It has recently come to our attention that the pro-celery movement is amassing a huge army and doing a lot of celery PR. I am shocked at how blatant their activities are, as if they are just talking about something like curing cancer or raising toys for tots or other fine community building activities.

The article I'm about to show you is an example of how insidious their pro-celery activities are. The next thing you know they'll be serving celery in schools. (NEWS FLASH: My assistant editing this article pointed out to me that they are already serving celery in schools. TO OUR UNSUSPECTING CHILDREN! It's madness!)

So we have two boycott items: Wemerge Magazine and the American Celery Association

Spread the word... because these things might start jumping out at you from dark alleys and you need to know to protect yourself.

Source: Miami New Times