We have recently received this message from a group of pro-celery terrorists. Please send the kids out of the room before you scroll down. Our celery bouncer has been notified and is prepared to take action.
Take heart, people. These activists are the types who use fear and misinformation to discourage and dishearten you. Just remember -- you are on the right path. We have turned this message into our investigative division and will report back when we have more information.
Let's keep doing business as usual until we have reason to do otherwise.